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About Varied / Hobbyist Member Violet/AlexanderOther/United States Recent Activity
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So...I went out shopping with an old friend.
At Rue 21, I bought red and black men's boxer-briefs, a cheetah print bow tie, and hipster shoes.
Needless to say, the cashier guy gave me the weirdest look ever.
It was great. I hope to have more priceless memories in the future. Memories of gender confusion and comical situations. Yes.

Also, I saw Dracula Untold with said friend. Needless to say again, I loved it. I lived for the action scenes. And the part where the camera follows the bats' point of view. Hell yes. My love of vampires and the night is being satisfied quite well this year. <3

I suppose this is quite boring. Ahh, I've been really busy and am doing this to just vent. Like usual. Now that I've vented my happiness from movies, friends, and shopping, I shall now vent my confusion and frustration.

I like many people. Like-like, as child-me would say. And a few of those people like me back. To some this wouldn't be a problem, but it's sort of stressing me out. Like...Each person is different in a very special way, and I can't decide between them. So instead of winding up with a partner or someone to date every once in a while, I am with no one, struggling over this stupid situation. If I pick one person, even to date casually, the rest would be mad or disappointed, and I may miss out on who I should really be with. But I can't know who to be with without trying. And I can't try because no matter what someone would get hurt. I'm in a limbo. Asdfghjkl I was never good at getting below the bar. Or hopping over. Haha, this is silly. There's also another person that's been plaguing my mind lately, but they are totally separate from this situation, which I'm quite glad for. *shakes head* STUFF.

Ooooookay! That's out. Good. Sorry you went through all of that with me. Unless you skipped all of that. If so, I don't mind, hehe.

Time to write Halloween poems and watch the leaves fall. God bless what little glance of Autumn I get each year. It keeps me going.
  • Mood: Stuck
  • Listening to: Animals -Maroon 5
  • Reading: Dracula
  • Watching: Pewdiepie
  • Eating: Pumpkin-cinnamon bread
  • Drinking: Hot Chocolate
Colors, wonders, passions, and music.
All things that make me think of you.
Coffee, sweets, the bite of dark coffee.
Dark chocolate and honey and Earl Grey tea.
Will you also think of me?

There’s nothing much to do, friend.
So! Let’s talk about the weather.
I really love the fall,
the cool breeze in September.
The leaves all glowing red
as they face their death
screaming internally.
Cinnamon and Halloween.

Bass drops and candy shops.
Something hot to eat.
Movies and ballroom dances.
Sand and water on your feet.

Don’t
save the
last dance
for me.

I couldn’t bear to wait.

Don’t
save the
last dance
for me.

I’d like all of them, since this is our date.

Cherry blossoms and festivals.
Let’s go to Japan!
Masquerades and small parades!
Country bike rides here in Michigan.

Like falling petals,
I’m falling for you.
Blushing reds and pinks
and, violets too.

Like falling petals,
I’ll float to where you are.
Across many lands,
In spacey shuttle cars.

This is an invitation.
To the grand masquerade.
A real one, this time,
with many songs to be played.

This is an invitation.
Will you go with me?
It'll be a hell of a sight to see!
I’m falling without hesitation…
So please,
Accept my sincere invitation?~
And don't save the last dance for me.
An Invitation (Falling Petals 1)
Haha, there really is a masquerade this time! I'm going with a girl I met here at college. And maybe a friend too, since I don't want said girl to get the wrong idea. Asdfghjkl.
It's an LGBT+ event with other stuff besides the dance too? I think? It's basically an alternative to Homecoming, which I think is really cool. Even cooler: It'll be held in a church. Or by a church. I'm not sure. I think it's neat that the church is so accepting of our community though.

Other than that, I added in the normal stuff: All of my secrets. All of my thoughts. All of the things I myself am still unaware of.

I don't have my scanner with me in my dorm, so expect a lot more things like this.

Also, I'm sick and have a cloudy head. Please excuse me if I have grammammammatical errors.
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So...Here's an update...*sinks down in chair*
*sinks to the floor*
*becomes the anime*
*becomes a puddle*
I am an anime puddle. Such trash.

Anyways! College is college. The friends that I make are very loosely called so, and everything is fairly stereotypical. I only have the weekends to keep in touch with my actual friends and watch the animes and read the mangas and drown myself in the youtubes.
I'm feeling depressed. Of course it's normal for me (not to sound pitiful), but this time it's different from when I was depressed in high school. This time there are no true friends around me to hold me and tell me stupid things. I feel like I've been distanced from my online friends too. I feel truly alone. A girl here really likes me, bu she gives me anxiety and I only like her as a friend. I should be meeting an old friend that graduated before me, who is an exchange student from China and is super sweet, but I'm not sure if she'll still like me. Asdfghjkl. Life problems. I know they're not too significant, but my heart is yearning. For...something. Someone. I'm not even sure anymore. I wish I could take my brain and heart out so I could have a conversation with them to figure their shit out. I'm so confused. Blahhh.

Okay! Enough of my venting!

I talked with my mom the other day. She's all for getting me all of the tattoos I want when we have money. I'm definitely getting Koujaku's flower tattoos first. I won't be getting the black ones he has for a while because...
I might be getting chest surgery to sculpt my chest to be like a male's. I told my mom that I didn't like having boobs and, like with the tattoos, she was all for it! I was very surprised! She didn't even ask why. She just said that I can once we have enough money (which might not be for many years because of college and all.) I suppose most girl's my age are asking for breast implants, so I can sort of see how she'd see it in a positive light. Hm. Maybe I can soon tell her about my gender and sexuality. I'm hoping for the best.

I bleached parts of my hair in order to put red in it for Halloween, but I'm keeping it a dark blonde for the time being. Because I've become the anime. I will show pictures of it soon, because I rather like it.

A girl in my public speaking class gave a speech about how it is to be a twin. I could only think of the precious/sadistic not-twins, Virus and Trip. It was wonderful to say the least.

Hm, I think that's all. Thank you, if you're reading this. You've made it a long ways. I appreciate you putting up with all of this.

How are you all? How is school? How is life?
  • Mood: Confused
  • Listening to: My roommates' TV
  • Reading: Dracula
  • Eating: sweets~
  • Drinking: Earl Grey tea
Trip (And Trip in Virus's glasses~) by VioletAlexander
Trip (And Trip in Virus's glasses~)
Okay, so it's not exactly like Trip's hair (from DRAMAtical Murder) but it's awesome for what my hairstylist had to go off of. (Which was a lousy description by yours truly.) Once I get used to my hair being short again I'll fix it up.
I was growing it out, but it got extremely hard to manage. I guess I'll get a pretty wig if I want long hair. X3
(Haha, parts of my hair are still red, so maybe when I put more red in I can be Trip if he doesn't bleach his hair. Excuses for not being completely blonde.)

Speaking of Trip though...I was thinking.
I like Virus more. Really. He's more sensitive and has a better style and a better voice and is...Hm. I don't know how to put it. He has a certain kind of elegance that is calming despite what he does. (And is more sensual rather than purely sexual.) But...I think that's why I make a good Trip when I'm feeling like it. Because of my appreciation and admiration for Virus. Yep. Rambling again.

I'll go. Talk to you all when it's possible! I'll probably make a Skype or something.

btw, don't mind the silly collages I make. I just don't want to spam everyone with similar pictures.
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The dust on your shelves
whisper to me
the secrets about what you do alone.
I am the ghost in your room.
The walls listened and captured the emotions
that were thrown at them
from voices both loud and soft,
crying and screaming.
They captured every moment.
Every conversation that went downhill.
Ah, the things the walls pick up.
The things the dust gathers on.
Perhaps I too shall one day gather myself up
and sit,
watching your life.
And if I want to interact
with your hands
upon the piano?
Ah, it seems I can’t.
I suppose I’ll just have to watch.
I’ll play my violin to accompany
the sad tones of your keyboard.
Hey, even though you can’t hear me,
I hope my music will speak to you.
Reach your ears just a little bit.
So you can feel me.
My presence.
Right beside you.

Your eyes look to the side,
your fingers still gently pushing down the keys.
Can you see me?
No…
But, maybe, you can sense me.

I’m here for you,
friend.
I’ll play the music with you
when no one else will.
I’ll give you a quiet atmosphere to study in.
No interruptions!
You must get good grades, dear.

I’ll tuck you in at night
and sit at the foot of your bed
or at your window,
guarding you from the other unseen things.

I’ll open the curtains at night,
letting the moon shine on your face.
Do you feel its glow?
Can you feel the flickers of every star?
All watching you?
Can you feel me?
My eyes love you more than the stars and moon do.
I’m here for you.

The dust settles and becomes quiet.
The walls creak with the saturation of emotions.
I sing out about the stars, the moon, space and the cosmos.
And the creatures in the sea.
Friend,
I’m here for you.
So,
please be there for me.

The dust lingers on the old books
you haven’t touched in years.
The walls watch you live
in your dreams and with your fears.
I’m afraid I will not leave now,
even though I’ve seen the light.
Friend, I want to stay with you
and sing to you at night.

And even though you can’t see me,
I think you’ve come to know
that everything will be alright
with me guarding your window.
The dust has been brushed away
and the walls repainted too.
My darling friend, here I will stay.
A ghost devoted to you.
I Will Stay
I haven't written a poem or anything in a while, so here's something! It was mostly random, since I've been thinking about ghosts and vampires lately.
As always, I can't wait for Halloween.
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VioletAlexander's Profile Picture
VioletAlexander
Violet/Alexander
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
So...I am 18. I'm nonconforming in gender and sexuality. I go by any pronouns and you may call me either Violet or (obviously) Alexander, since I go by both depending on the day. If you want to know more, don't be afraid to ask. I'm very friendly and don't judge others. :3

my tumblr: clockwork-alexander.tumblr.com…

"I'm an open book. So much of one, in fact, that my pages constantly become weathered and torn. In the end, no matter how many pages of myself I display, they all become rather unreadable." -Me

Here are some friends I love. Go check them out, some are amazing artists! :3
:iconespada-kitsuki: :iconscarletsutcliff: :iconblackxred29: :iconmoiscen: :iconkeiichou: :iconstickiebun13: :iconmysteriousglowcloud: :iconnoodle2379: :iconcamtheyaoifan: :iconsweetlittlevampire: :iconiam20percentcooler:

So...More things about me...

I love tea. And coffee. And sweets. *flails* STRAWBERRIES. <3

I like:
Welcome to Night Vale, DRAMAtical Murder, Homestuck, Kuroshitsuji, Free!, SnK (Attack on Titan), Death Note, Hetalia, Kaichou wa Maid-sama, Blue Exorcist, Ouran High School Host Club, Chobits, Dangan Ronpa, and Yaoi/Yuri in general because it's a great thing.~
...I also like Once Upon a Time, Phantom of the Opera, and everything to do with the Sherlock Holmes books or movies. I would've put them in the above list, but...they'd seem out of place. (Oh, and the new MLP is really cute...er...20% cooler~)

I've been playing the piano/taking lessons for ten years thus far, alto sax for about seven, violin for a half a year, accordion for whoevenknows, and slowly picking up on the guitar... I'm very musical and I compose songs when I have time.

I'm into art (of course), writing, fashion, makeup, design, acting, and the like. I may not seem like it all the time, but I have an obsession for style and costuming. (Yes, that includes cosplay). It's always been a little dream of mine to be a fashion designer or to do makeup for movies/theatre.
...Or to be a person to design and do makeup for Drag Kings/Queens but...I honestly don't think there is such a profession. Not in my small-town, anyways. XD

Enough of my petty ramblings! I'm going to go see what those ratchet lights are 100 feet above the Arby's...Because girl! I have. No. Time. *snaps fingers with fabulous sass*
"Good night, listeners. Good night......."~
Interests

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:iconsweetlittlevampire:
SweetLittleVampire Featured By Owner Oct 1, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
You have been tagged! :D

Songs Meme!
Reply
:iconvioletalexander:
VioletAlexander Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Yay! Fun! Hehe, I can't wait until I have enough wifi to do this... ;A;
Reply
:iconsweetlittlevampire:
SweetLittleVampire Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Ah, dumb internet connection! *threatens*
Reply
:iconedermarmae:
Edermarmae Featured By Owner Aug 15, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
LOL I remember looking at the homestuck panel 
Reply
:iconvioletalexander:
VioletAlexander Featured By Owner Aug 16, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
LOL! XD
Hey, I looked through your gallery a bit. Your art is pretty cool! :D
Reply
:icongeekinspired:
GeekInspired Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for the watch! <3
Reply
:iconvioletalexander:
VioletAlexander Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Yep! (^3^)
Reply
:iconkenkens:
KenKens Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Hello! ^p^ I just wanted to thank you for how nice you are omg I feel so honored and just abbsgsvdsdvasg /w\ and sorry I never reply to anything on tumblr! it's only because I still kinda have no clue what I'm doing on there XD I'm like a grandmother trying to learn how to use the internet
plus I get kinda shy about stuff; I'm a baby grandmother ////w\\\\
But you are AWESOME, super nice and cool and should know that C:
Reply
:iconvioletalexander:
VioletAlexander Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh, it's no problem. I think you and your art is hella cool. (Oh my gosh, I have no idea either. It's okay. XD)
baby...grandmother.....Hm. That makes perfect sense. I gotcha.
Aww, thanks.~ :iconblushplz:
Reply
:iconkenkens:
KenKens Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Thank you too and you're welcome!! :] Someday we'll both figure it out I'm sure! :D (Big Grin) 
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